There are a lot of people who dislike the holidays and they have all sorts of different reasons for not liking them. Some people see them as superficial, some think that the true greed of humanity comes out, or any other number of reasons. My reason usually seems petty until those around me actually understand the reasons why. My mother.
My mother is not like most mothers. I like to think of most mothers as kind, caring, and supportive of their children. They raise their children and nurture them. My mother left my father and I when I was two to indulge herself in an addiction to meth. She was in and out of my life for the better part of 28 years. i would see her on occasion at holiday dinners and extremely short (sometimes five minutes) visits. I was unaware of her drug problem until i was 12 years old when she called me on Mother’s Day (kind of backwards huh?) to let me know she was entering a rehab facility.
At the beginning of this year I received a very similar phone call. The only difference is that she was also asking for me to come pick up my youngest sister. This I had absolutely no problem with. I had wanted to take my sister in since the day she was born, but I was unable to support the two of us financially. I drove to pick her up and I asked my mother if my sister knew what was going on. My mother had decided not to tell her she was entering in a six month rehab facility (great, this poor girl is going to think our mother is abandoning her and blame herself).
My sister has been in my care ever since. I would not change my decision to take her in for all the money in the world. We had some adjusting to get used to, but we are now functioning very well.
At about 8am Thursday morning I woke up to a less than pleasant text message from my mother. She was completely irate and wanting to know who is watching my sister while I work the night shift (my shift is 8am to 5pm). Then she was threatening to come get my sister (not going to happen). The end of the text was YOU NEED TO CALL ME RIGHT NOW.
I honestly should have grabbed my Xanax bottle at that exact moment, but silly me, I called my mother instead. Apparently she had read a comment on Facebook and had twisted it in some form or fashion to think i was working nights. I Immediately started shaking. If there is one thing that can automatically send me spiraling into an anxiety attack, it would be one of my mother’s meltdowns. This is not the first occasion. this happens almost every single holiday. On Mother’s Day she had a meltdown in the middle of a restaurant accusing me of changing her Facebook password and then rigging the site where she could not update her own password. I still have not been able to show my face inside that restaurant.
Why don’t i just block her from my Facebook account you ask? I have no idea. I probably should have. I did however add her to the restricted list after Thanksgiving so that all she can see are my public posts.
This is why I dislike the holidays. My psychotic mother.
I am sure there are a lot of people who have far bigger problems than I do. I am sure there are people who would love a family to spend Thanksgiving with. If you are one of those people who need a family to spend the holidays with, please comment below and I will give you my mother’s address. You can go in my place. 😉
Details Jamie 